After my experience yesternight I awoke with a keen sense of purpose. I would remain alert all the day, ready to answer the smallest call. Knowing that it was food in excess that had led me astray, I resolved that I should defeat this temptation fully. The first idea that arises in a man's mind when he is considering how to end his gluttony, or indeed any of the vices of intemperance, is to stay away from the evil item at all costs and at all times, forbearing, so far as he is able, even thinking of the thing. This, however powerful the inclination to act on this impulse, and however wise the path appears on the surface, is in reality the act of a consummate fool. The more one tries to remove the offending thought from the front of the mind, the more consistently and powerfully it resides in the back. It bides its time, growing and feeding off of a man's decaying patience until, in a burst of passion only possible due to the will being utterly exhausted, the vice leaps from the subconscious and into action.

I knew what to do. For the whole morning I painstakingly collected food, understanding that the way to victory lay in mastering this demon head on. After I had collected all of this food, I began to stare and contemplate it, fighting and battling the urges that rattled and raged in my loins. I sat there for no less than half the day, my ration being a single red berry each hour. I would take this berry and consume it, feeling the nourishment enter my bones and focusing on the hunger pangs in my stomach, seeing them each passing hour more and more clearly as the lies they were.

By sundown my spirit was at peace. I knew that I had conquered my vice, and I was settling down to sleep. It was then that I was rewarded for my faithfulness. The light entered the pool as before, but no images began to form upon its surface. Instead, the light collected into the center of the pool and then moved towards the edge where I sat. The light grew smaller and smaller, yet brighter and brighter as it concentrated itself into a fist size area, then shot up from the surface and into my chest! The spirit had entered its servant and would now use the vessel for its purposes.

Of course, there are no words to describe my inner experience, but I will attempt to relate those things which happened outside my body. I rose and went to my collection of vittles. Taking those same red berries which had been my meager but sufficient sustenance that day, I began to amass them into a pile and then smash them into a rich paste. My arms and legs were not my own as I walked to my pack and loosed my journal. Glory and praise, my hands were infused with the spirits of the highest, and they took that paste and began to create, just as had the night before been prophesied! Oh, Oh! Mine hands have drawn, they have drawn! Mine fingers have traced, they have traced! In this humble journal was put down the messages from the skies!

I blacked out. I found myself several hours later still next to my journal. As I woke, I glanced down into it, having forgotten what had transpired, and was met with a shock that took my breath away. There right below me was a message from the gods, the script the same as I have seen twice in the holy pool, yet in my own handwriting! And there too the images! What were they? The oval wheel of fate, the gathered sages, the ruling vizier, all sitting before my eyes and all having been depicted by my hand!

What is the meaning of too much blessing? Where is the limit of destiny? Can a mortal stand to be the pen of eternity and live?

It seems that I, poor I, chosen I, shall delve these cavernous secrets.

My shame overflows as I put this pen to paper, and I would wish upon myself a thousand lashings afore I admitted to those wrongdoings that I shall henceforth set down, but I write on still for it is the beginning of my penance.

Tonight I have been found out for that which I am: an ungrateful scoundrel more interested in my own pleasures and desires than in doing that which is right. One would imagine that after an experience with the Truth such as I have had, that no amount of time or hardship would prevent me from attending to my proper duties, let alone that I would allow myself to be distracted by mere base appetites. Well, I tell you it is not so. After awakening from a sleep filled with shaded wonders, I began to celebrate my fortune with my friend camel. All today I ate and drank, eating and drinking so till I could not bear to even think any longer about food or water. Ask a man who has thirsted in the dry desert for months how long it takes to lose the taste for that sweet nectar water after returning from a journey, and from his reply you shall understand the excesses that I engaged in which led me to destroy mine in a day. I had written yesterday that my greatest desire was to serve. I was correct; I keenly enjoyed serving myself.

Well, after such a gorging man sleeps. I woke in the middle of the night, tar black except for the glow of the pool. The shock I felt nearly knocked me senseless as I realized I was missing the vision the spirit was stirring in the water. I got up and ran to the edge in haste, but too late! As I was running towards the pool I could see its beams casting upwards towards the night sky and there illumining a scene upon the clouds that was unspeakable in its beauty. A woman, a mountain, an eagle eyed scepter… ah but it was gone! For but a half of a second I saw this fading glory of the heavens played out upon the earthly heavens we call sky, but then no more. I arrived at the edge of the pool but saw nothing but the luminescence leave. Immediately I began to wail and weep into the pool, when as of a sudden the light flashed back into it, not slowly as it did the night before, but all at once. That same force gripped me as I kneeled there, and my face was held still to be shown that which it was decreed I should see. I could sense in my soul that this force knew of my faithlessness, and I felt its anger and distress. This time I tried with all my will to break away from the pool, and I can attest that I would have run away to burn in the desert rather than stay and face my punishment. However, I could sooner have escaped from the jaws of the crocodile than free myself from the force's grip, and I resigned to sit myself there and accept fate.

The lines came and congealed once more. What was there, what was there? Oh but high things, grand things, great things! But upon those I willn't dwell, since this was a message sent to crush my pride and not to inflame it. Amidst a shining glory I could make out a heavenly litter making its way towards a humble abode. It was a litter not carried by men but rather by angelic power, for it moved of itself with none to draw it. At its long journey's end out stepped the esteemed messenger it carried. This messenger in haste made his way to the abode, his speed shaming me all the more as I saw what good service he gave to the Heavens, and I tried again to pull away from the pool. But I would have my reward in full, and so it went on as my face was pulled even closer in. The messenger stepped to the door and knocked, then waited. How my heart burned inside me as I saw this, knowing that this humble abode represented none other than me! The messenger was bringing the words of conviction to my very doorstep, and even now I was to receive them in their full weight. In fullness I did receive them, for next the light disappeared and again there was that unutterable script. I feared for my very life, bethinking that they were none other than the words of a death sentence, but, how gracious this spirit!, they were the words of my redemption! I had offended the gods surely, but here it was the way back to hope. The words I still could not read, but that force gave me understanding and taught me their meaning. Though I had sinned I could be redeemed, though I had erred I could again rise to stand. I would be filled with the very spirit that inhabited these waters, and when it came upon me in force I would create with that same power! I would become its conduit, and through obedience to its will I should slowly earn again my freedom. I bowed to this gracious opportunity, and my mind was swept by the winds into the stars. I was filled with the energy of the spirit of the oasis, and shown further terrors and mysteries, so unfathomable I cannot set them down.

So, I have admitted my wrongs, and still I keenly feel their guilt. But perhaps they were for the best, since now I am given a gift, though awful, yet still unlike any that has been known to any man. I sit now, alert and ready, for when I am called upon to serve. This time, however, I shall serve the worthy and not the unworthy.

August 16, 1531

Sahara Desert, Northern Africa
A lowly bedouin and his friend camel